I'm excellent.

Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men. - Collosians 3:23.

This verse gives me so much purpose and drive. It's so easy for motivation to slip away when you have a really bad prof, or a boss that's mad at you. It's easy to grumble about life when you have piles of homework to finish, and when life's cares are weighing down on you.

But, to work at something with all your heart, not only working hard at it, but excelling at it for God. To bring Glory to him.

Teach slaves to be subject to their masters in everything, to try to please them, not to talk back to them, and not to steal from them, but to show that they can be fully trusted, so that in every way they will make the teaching about God our Savior attractive. - Titus 2: 9-10

If we live a life that's completely mundane - if we aren't excelling at anything, it we aren't trustworthy and hard-working, why would anyone that doesn't know Jesus ever want to live like us and know him too?

I feel like we're stuck in a societal norm that tells us to be mediocre - You're normal if you get average grades, have a decent job, make some friends, and get by in life by having a good time.

But, I feel like there is so much more, that as followers of Christ we're called to lives that are excellent: lives filled with purpose and direction, favour and dreams.

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Church was so good tonight.

K

All by myself.

Lonely. It's defined as being without company, not frequented by human beings, sad from being alone.

And, while on the surface that definition may seem to be correct, I don't know if I fully agree.

Because I've been with great groups of people before, and still felt this so called feeling of being alone. I've also been by myself for long periods of time and felt completely comfortable. So what is it really? Because I know we've all felt it at one point in time. Is it really about being by yourself? Being without friends? Without companionship?

For me, lonely is more than being without company.

Lonely is missing someone you care about a lot. And It may not even be that that someone is geographically far away from you. It may just be that they've changed, or you've changed, and you're missing what used to be.

Lonely is needing a hug, or someone to talk to.

It's realizing that everyone is pursing a different dream, living a different life - moving down a path that is in the opposite direction of your path.

Lonely is the transitional period that comes with change.

And sometimes lonely can show up even when you're in a room full of people.

For me, lonely has nothing at all to do with the actual state of being alone. It's more about missing the ones that you love, and hoping that they too, are missing you.

K

Drafts...

January 18, 2010

Good morning Monday.
You're gray today. Solemn and moody. Quiet.

I'd sleep you away If I could. But life goes on, without stopping to ask if you need a day to rest.

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January 9, 2010

I've spent my entire weekend holed up in my house, finishing homework, watching T.V., reading my book, and playing some music. That pretty much sums it up.

This is after me trying to set up some interesting plans for at least some of my 4 day weekend. In the end, I had absolutely no luck.

It's difficult to keep up long-distant friendship. I don't even think it has anything to do with the physical distance (although that does make it more difficult). It's more about the frequency that you see the person.

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December 25, 2009

I sit here, staring at the blank computer screen, wondering what I should write down.

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December 18, 2009
The life of a university student is not glamorous, especially if you're a keener.

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December 14, 2009

I just need to stop thinking.
And then I'll be great.

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December 5, 2009

I know.

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Yea, so those are most of the drafts that I've started and never finished and decided not to publish.

But for lack of creativity, and for the comment on my last post. Here they are. Enjoy.

K

Good morning Monday.

Yet another blog post saved into my drafts.

Thoughts.

I always knew there would be concepts and ideas that I'd come across in my study of psychology that would contradict what I believe. I came across that this week in my lecture hall.

I'm taking up piano again - Gr. 9, I'm not working towards finishing it, or taking the exam. I just got the book and am learning some songs in it when I find the time.

I spend my Thursdays in my room doing homework. All day.

Sometimes I fell like I go and go and go and go and don't have time to just stop and take a day off.

There are so many things that I want to do, and I don't have time to do all of them. I hate that.

But I still feel like I'm pursuing something worthwhile - that I'm following my dreams. So, overall I'm good. Tired. But good.

Kirstyn.

Nooma

Yesterday I was wasting time on Youtube when I discovered that people have nothing better to do than make videos about Rob Bell videos - that and calling him a heretic.

Which I think is funny, and slightly sad. Considering that most of them take what he says out of context to mean something completely different.

I actually find Rob Bell quite intelligent, and have enjoyed some of his written/video material.

So there.

K