I just wanna be beautiful.

Sometimes Christmas is more work than play.
Sometimes.
Sometimes.

I give up.

And I even told myself that I would not have an agenda today.
That way I couldn't possibly be disappointed.
I just want it to go back to how it used to be.

Every time. It's the same feeling.

What a Christmas!

It took me a little bit longer to fall asleep last night. I had lyrics running over and over again in my head.
These last few days have been a whirlwind of recording, singing, praying, singing some more, playing piano, listening to the tracks, brainstorming ideas, drinking water, singing some more, adding harmonies, fixing 'mistakes', and putting together a compilation of the songs I've been writing since the spring of 2007.

We ended up finishing everything on that list in the previous post. We started at 11am and finished somewhere close to 6pm.

This album is actually a dream come true. It's a testimony to God's faithfulness in my life. It's a composition of my deepest emotions and creativity.

At the beginning of this year I wrote down a list of dreams that I wanted to see God accomplish in my life this year.

In regards to this particular dream, I bravely wrote:

"I want time, strength, ability, and resource to record my songs. I would even further say that I want to do it professionally."

In January, I had no idea how and if God could EVER accomplish this dream. But he came through. And look where I am now.

I went into this weekend with a sore throat and the beginnings of a cold. I would like to say that I trusted God to heal me by the time Monday came, but I'm not as trusting as I like to think I am.
It's easy to trust God when everything is going great, but as soon as something goes wrong, It's as if I want to do everything myself.

I worried and wanted to keep everything under my own control. My parents, who like to tell me straight up when I'm not trusting God, thankfully kept me in check and encouraged me through the weekend. On Monday, my sore throat was basically gone, but I was still stuffed up, and slightly apprehensive about how much I would be able to sing that day.

I was hoping, at best, to lay down 3 maybe 4 songs. I ended up recording 9 of the 11 songs on the CD. My voice did not fail me. In fact I was able to reach all of the difficult notes, and recorded some great stuff. I credit that to God. Completely.

This recording is a testimony. It's a reminder that I can't do it alone. On Monday, I needed God to come through for me in order to sing, and He did.

Anyways, the album is coming out in April. There's still a ton of work to do until then. I hope that everyone will join me at the concert. I'll keep you updated.

Kirstyn.

Yup yup, started recording today.

I'm utterly exhausted.
I feel like I want to curl up in front of the TV and watch a Christmas movie.

I spent the entire day recording my album.
And all in the midst of an "almost-over" cold.

We ended up recording nine of the eleven songs that I plan on putting on the CD.
Some of them we laid down with only one take, some we had to record several times before we got a good one.

Tomorrow, the schedule is:

Record the last 2 songs.
Fix up any blips.
Record harmony.

This is exhilarating. And exhausting. And exciting.

K

Yea, I'm gonna be ok.

So, everyone got their wish. It was a snow day!

I applied for University today.
It's nerve wracking in a relieving sort of way. If that makes any sense.

I honestly wonder sometimes what it would be like to be a procrastinator. I wonder what it feels like to not care about your grades, or to not put effort into a project. I wonder what it's like to not be on task, and what it would be like to never freak out about getting below and 80% on a test.

I guess I wonder because all of those things are TOTALLY opposite from me. It just is simply the way I am.

This week has been an extremely busy one. I finished my math test on Wednesday, wrote my Bio test this afternoon, and tomorrow I technically have one more day of school before the Christmas break. Everyone in their right mind is wishing their butt's off for a snow day tomorrow. Nobody wants to go to school.

And to be honest with you. I don't plan on going at all. Regardless of the arrival of a snow day or not. I just can't picture myself spending 2 hours on a yellow school bus trudging through the 10-15 cm of freshly fallen snow we're supposed to get tomorrow.

I have to actually tell myself that it is ok to miss a day of school.
Kirstyn, it is ok to miss a day of school.

So here is the official "List of Things to do during Christmas Break"

• Apply for University.
• Apply for the French 'Explore' program for this upcoming summer.
• Finish any leftover homework.
• Study for exams?? Not sure if that will EVER happen (even in the midst of my 'on-task' personality)

And finally, and definitely the most significant of them all:

RECORD MY DEBUT ALBUM!

Yea, pretty much. I am officially and professionally recording a CD on Monday and Tuesday of this upcoming week.

K

I have had it up to here ...*swipes hand over head in quick motion*.... with Biology 12U!

Never alone

I keep coming back here. Hoping that I'll have something inspiring to write.
But I don't.
I could say that time is flying so fast. Too fast? I can't tell.
I could say that I'm in the process of recording an album.
I could say that school seems to take up all my time.
I could say that sometimes I'm infatuated with someone simply because they're the only one around.
I could say that I'm about to apply for University.
I could say ...

And sometimes I feel so wrapped up in my own little world. Because I am. I don't want to say that it's inevitable.

I want to go a little deeper than where I've been the last few weeks.
And for one of the first times, it seems hard to do that.
Slow down.
I know.
Is there time to slow down?
And if I find there is time... I'm just hearing silence.
When I want to hear Your voice....
...Again.

K